UK Bound!

Hi!

So far, 5 days in UK has seemed like forever.. In Durham at the moment and I'm just lazing around in the living room with Suhaila and Mummy. It is so much colder here in the North!! Would have frozen to death probably if Suhaila hadn't turned up the central heating. Waiting for Suhaila's boxes to arrive from the storage company... We have A LOT of work to do today.

Haven't eaten anything because we haven't bought any groceries and we can't leave the house now that the storage company people might come any time. But somehow I'm not hungry at all. Maybe it's the cold diminishing my appetite.

Whatever it is, I hope everyone in Singapore is doing well. Because I miss them terribly :(

I miss daddy terribly today too. Today he even said "Missing you all. Should have come to UK with you that day"

Soon daddy, soon :-) I can't wait too!!

Dear Diary

Dear Diary,

Looking back, I feel that I have really changed a lot during my gap year. For one thing, I actually want to come back home in December, which is something I never thought I would ever feel. I have never loved Singapore more than I do now. Never did I imagine that the day would come where I feel that maybe, just maybe, this is where I want to live in the future. I love London, I want to live in London and there's that beautiful thing about California and the sunset and beaches. But in Singapore, I have Sandra, Oreo, I have a house, a bedroom. Friends and family whom I've grown closer to.

I am not sad to be leaving home. I actually feel happy. I feel blessed to have something that I love this much that I do not want to leave. From now on, I vow to see everything in a positive light. Even during the hardest of times, as long as I have my family and friends by my side, I will remain positive and strong.

More on my gap year tomorrow. Time to sleep.

Good night!

Dear diary

Dear diary,

It's been a long long time since I wrote anything. And reading back some of my previous posts, I'm really astounded by how negative I sounded sometimes. Well I guess everyone has those days XD.. Time to start filling you up with more joy and happiness!!:) 

Will get back soon to writing. Now is way past bed time (4.56am!!! Probably latest I've slept all summer LOLOLOL) and I should really go to sleep cause I have an early day tomorrow. 

Happy fact: Abby just came back and we had supper together as a family!!!! (Not without a mini family drama of course HAHA)

Good night!

How sore

Realisation 2014.

Sometimes the people who mean a lot to u, whom u sorely wish would come for u, may not. And its going to hurt like hell. Its going to make u feel sucky and confused, make u wonder whether ur really unworthy of care and friendship. Ur going to go to bed with a broken heart, wake up to the sun feeling miserable. And think its you. And ur going to think of ways of how to prove yourself to them, so they can see that they were wrong about u, that u really are worth it. But we all know theyre not going to change their minds. Ur going to get exhausted trying, and after realising that they just don't give a shit, u feel like u've lost so much to them. U gave up so much for them. U gave up time, u gave up people, u gave up ur own mind. All for nothing. For someone who couldnt see what an amazing person u are. Someone who was too blinded and immature, whose mind was set as cold as stone not to take a second look at you. 

Worst of all, it really felt like your loss and not theirs, not just in ur eyes but in theirs too.

Bloodstream

Words can be like knives; they can cut u open.

</3

ANother day

5 days left to prepare for UKCAT. Still feeling out of sorts... Can't help it, right? :( My head is throbbing on and off, my eyes are tired from sleeping at 5 in the morning. RAYA, time to be humanized!!!!

It would be nice to get a massage right now ;) Heh heh

Can't help worrying about Pham that Vietnamese friend of mine. Haven't heard from her since Saturday (well, actually since last Tuesday but since her last seen was Saturday, I assume she was safe till then). Omg Pham if you're safe you better facebook me or smth -.- I will really KILL you if I find out it wasn't because your phone was stolen/damaged/lost.

Who cares about UKCAT

This isn't supposed to be a pessimistic post! Nor is it a happy-go-lucky post.

But, really. Who cares about the UKCAT? I don't. I seriously don't see the point in doing it, except that almost every medic school in UK cares about the UKCAT. So i don't really have a choice :/ Forced to care.

Or maybeeeee.

I should just get a back up plan. I don't really need medicine anyway to achieve dreams of becoming a nurse/nutritionist. When there's a will, there's a way! Since this whole UCAS thing began I started to believe in the truth of that seemingly crappy quote :p

Ok. I have 29 days to turn my life around before school begins again.

School. Ewwwww :(

Just can't start living until I get the things I wanted to get done since before summer done. Or at least started and not on some kind of five second rebound rate.

Will start researching more about science and nutrition. For my own sake and for better foundation on these kinds of things. Abang is an expert and I'm a noob :p

Ok, research about hair. For shai's sake, so I can give her more tips. And kind of for me too. Ahahahha.

And keep playing badminton. No shit sherlock. It's an addiction x)

Told you this wasn't going to be a happy-go-lucky hipster post!